At the grocery store last night a Toaster Strudel box caught my eye. The flavor was Boston Cream Pie. I'm not kidding. They've apparently moved beyond the point of even pretending that this is a viable breakfast option.
Growing up we always wanted Toaster Strudel, and PopTarts, Lucky Charms, etc. Unfortunately these items fall into my mother's Crap category. So we would ask, and she would reply "I won't let my children eat that crap! We're rich, we can afford whole wheat toast and no-sugar added peanut butter!" The rich line might have worked when we were very little, but by the time I was in second grade I was pretty sure that if we were really rich we'd be eating Cookie Crisp for breakfast.
But every once in a while she would buy a box of "crap" for us to fight over. The only rule was that you had to have a bowl of good cereal and then you could have the crap food item.
I remember rushing through my Rice Krispies and then carefully squeezing an elaborate icing design on my (kind of soggy, and still partially frozen) strudel. The icing pack was the best part. It was pure sugar and entertainment rolled into one - genius, just like Fun Dip; plus if you did it just right you would have a perfectly iced strudel AND a big glob of icing left over. The only problem was that after your strudel was iced and ready to eat, you were starting to feel full from the cereal. Oh well, you'd just power through the overly full feeling and savor every bite of awesomeness.
And then you felt like crap.
Maybe mom was right.